Narcissistic Devaluation

Narcissistic Devaluation – Understanding Why Narcissist Devalue, Discard & Leave Relationships

Memo: Narcissistic Devaluation – Devalue and Discard

From: Lisa E. Scott, the ‘official’ author of “Surviving A Narcissist – The Path Forward”

Dear Friend,

narcissistic devaluation devalue discardAre you in love with someone who gives you mixed signals? Perhaps never knowing from one minute to the next where you stand, where the relationship is going and if he is into you or not?

Does the slightest argument, setback, disagreement or criticism set him off into a rage or perhaps other forms of punishment, such as him being cold, distant and silent?

Do you find that his response to your needs, the way he treats you feels abnormal? You know you’re being mistreated, you know something is wrong but you cannot find it in yourself to walk away?

Maybe you have tried desperately to move on and yet you simply can’t let go? Did the relationship end suddenly, without warning? Perhaps with no closure?

Perhaps now he is giving you the silent treatment? As if you never existed?

Do you feel that something isn’t quite right in your relationship but you can’t quite put your finger on it?

Do you feel that whatever you do to please your partner or spouse, it just isn’t ever enough?

Do you feel insecure?

Do you notice a pattern of frequent ups and downs and as soon as you begin to think things have returned to normal, somehow your partner seems to pull the carpet from beneath you causing you to feel doubt and insecurity all over again?

Do you often feel crazy? Does your ex call you crazy?

Is it possible you’re in love with Narcissist?

Narcissist, Narcissistic Men And Narcissistic Devaluation

Narcissistic men, they need no introduction, do they? We know them all too well. Or do we? At one time, I thought I knew how to spot a selfish man, only to find, years later, I had no clue … literally.

When dating and falling in love, we try to avoid selfish men. We want to date a caring and compassionate man, and any sign of selfishness is a warning sign. Women pay attention to red flags. They are there for a reason … to warn us. But what happens when there are no red flags?

What if the person you fell in love with never offered up any type of red flag at all? He appeared more caring and sensitive than any man you’ve ever met. You thought you had finally found your knight in shining armor. You fall madly in love, certain you will spend the rest of your life together.

Years later, you wake up and realize the man lying in bed next to you is not the man you fell in love with at all. In fact, he’s not even close. There is no resemblance between this selfish person and the caring and giving man you fell in love with years ago. You know, the man you thought understood you like no one else? No, that man does not exist. He probably never did.

Surviving A Narcissist

Hi,

I am Lisa E. Scott, the Author of All About Him and Besting Selling Book,

Surviving A Narcissist – The Path Forward

Nobody knows better the pain of living with, loving, and leaving a narcissist better than I. I have been there and I know, first hand, how it feels to be the guiding shadow of a damaged man. I know what you are going through and have personally witnessed the pain and hopelessness you might be experiencing.

Unfortunately, I lived it, I breathed it and yes; I survived it!

Not only so, my ex-husband was a narcissist. Not just someone who exhibited narcissistic tendencies, but someone who was diagnosed with pathological narcissism by his own therapist. While I never understood what was happening and remained in disillusion for many years, when I finally realized that my husband would never change, that he was totally incapable of loving me and that I no longer wanted to spend my life in an abusive relationship, I knew I had to share my story with other victim’s.

I wrote my first book, It’s All About Him, to build awareness and help others recognize a narcissist before getting involved and potentially getting hurt! After watching myself and countless other victim’s become painfully scarred by such a man, by such an emotional roller-coaster ride, I decided to write my latest book.. “Surviving A Narcissist – The Path Forward”.

Sure you’re friends tell you to get it over it, and yet no one knows what it is like to be in a relationship with a narcissist unless they have been through it themselves.

I have been through it! Not with one narcissist but two.

In the beginning, everything was wonderful, right? He treated you like a queen and put you on a pedestal. My ex-husband, wrote endless amounts of romantic poetry for me. He treated me so well in the beginning that it seemed too good to be true. I should have listened to the old adage, “If it seems too good to be true, it is” for he was the furthest thing from the truth. I realized in the end that he had been putting on an act to win me over.

Unfortunately, men like my ex husband are very good actors, which makes it difficult to see through them. They can emulate emotions better than anyone. While they appear more sympathetic than the average man, the truth is, they are incapable of having strong feelings toward anyone but themselves. They have difficulty feeling love or empathy for anyone. They do not experience these feelings as others do. As a result, doing things for others is pointless to them. Their entire life revolves around doing things to please themselves.

With A Narcissist, Nothing You Do Is Ever Enough! The Cycles Of Narcissistic Devaluation, The Frequent Patterns Of Being Devalued By A Narcissistic Man Is Painful!

I want to be clear that in no way am I qualified to offer a professional opinion on how this disorder develops in a person, nor will I attempt to do so. I share my story with you for a few reasons.

First, I have always found it incredibly healing to write. In my opinion, if you don’t have a means to channel your pain, it will stay within you and become toxic. Writing this book has been a catharsis for me. Writing and music are outlets I cannot live without.

In addition, I tell my story to provide insight into the mind of a narcissist. It is important we understand how a narcissist thinks and just what motivates him. I want to help you recognize a narcissist, the narcissists personality before he takes advantage of you.

I also want you to understand that under no circumstance would I ever want to confuse readers by portraying that every single relationship circumstance is the same, nor is every man that happens to be a jerk a narcissist. This is simply not the case!

The PROBLEM IS THIS: Narcissists are an elusive breed that are often very hard to spot, hard to pinpoint, hard to understand and EXTREMELY hard to walk away from!

The cycles of high’s, followed by many sudden low’s is often an addictive pattern victim’s fall prey too.

Even Mental Health experts find it extremely difficult to measure the level and degree of narcissism one might carry. I am not a psychotherapist nor do I proclaim to be. My writing is solely based on years of experience. The experience of my own personal pain from loving a narcissistic man, and the journey to recovery.

My primary mission is to help you through this pain and to let you know that RECOVERY IS POSSIBLE!

Recovery Begins With Knowledge! Once You Begin To Educate Yourself On Why A Narcissist Uses Narcissistic Devaluation, Why The Narcissist Uses Projection & Why A Narcissist Will Not Change – Recovery Begins!

Yes, RECOVERY from Narcissistic Abuse begins with knowledge!

Of course you’re probably thinking to yourself, everyone has feelings. You may think that feelings are instinctual and we are all born with the ability to feel. You’re right. All humans have emotions; however, with narcissists those emotions and how they relate to those emotions, are not in the same as normal healthy functioning individuals.

Narcissism is a character trait that involves self-admiration, self-centeredness, and self-regard. Everyone has some degree of narcissism. It is what motivates us to get dressed and wash our hair in the morning. However, like many things, narcissism falls on a spectrum. To the far right end of this spectrum lies the extreme or pathological narcissist. This person’s narcissism is so severe or abnormal that when diagnosed, is classified as Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD).

This type of pathological narcissism is maladaptive, rigid, and relentless. It is a lifelong pattern of traits and behavior, which signifies obsession with oneself to the exclusion of all others. A narcissist lacks empathy and engages in a ruthless pursuit of gratification and dominance.

So why would we fall for a man that is so self-absorbed?

I am often asked why we fall for a narcissist? How is it possible for a man who is so self absorbed, so detached from love and the real meaning of commitment, make his way into our lives.

How can a woman like me, go from being confident, attractive, independent, driven and in-love, only to later find that she, through this abusive relationship has cast herself in the role of being – pitiful, dependent, depressed, confused and heartbroken?

How can a woman who is so cautious, so savvy to the world of dating and relationship games, and a woman toughened up when it comes to love and men, become smitten by such a pathological disorder of loving a narcissist?

Ladies… Let me explain!

How A Narcissist Wins You Over!

It is during the courting phase of a relationship that a narcissists false self is most inflated. Everyone puts their best foot forward when initially dating someone. Narcissists go above and beyond this, however, to the point of acting.

In my experience, narcissists have an uncanny ability to figure out what a particular woman wants in a man. They are then able to project this ideal image back to a woman in order to win her over. Narcissists put on a brilliant act when courting a woman. They know exactly how to impress and dazzle you.

You’re led to believe this man is your soul mate, and more caring and compassionate than any man you have ever met. You’re unaware of the fact that he is putting on an act in order to win your affections. Idealization is at its peak, and the man appears “too good to be true.”

It is difficult to avoid falling for a narcissist. They know exactly what you want to hear and exactly who you want them to be. Narcissists are gifted manipulators who can sweep anyone off their feet. They are charming and irresistible. Above all, they make you feel as though they understand you like no man has or ever will.

BUT… NO one, including ME, could ever prepare for the devaluation cycles you will eventually face when loving a narcissistic man!

The situation is quite horrifying and exhausting! Being discarded by narcissist, the cheating of a narcissist, the silent treatment the narcissist uses and the heartbreak I experienced from loving a narcissist, was the most devastating whirlwind I had ever encountered! So much so, I have spent over seven years documenting, writing and coaching victim’s of the narcissistic abuse.

My Mission Is To Help Victim’s Break Free The Emotional Bondage Of Loving A Damaged Man Such As A Narcissist! I Want To Help You Take Back Your Power & Break Away From The Never-Ending Cycles Of Narcissistic Devaluation!

So you’re probably asking yourself why a man so self-absorbed would have any interest in pursuing a relationship with a woman. I’ve asked myself this many times. What you have to understand is that narcissistic men who seek and chase women are looking for meaning to fill up their emptiness. They want someone to cater to their needs and fill the enormous void they feel inside.

Narcissists need people more than anyone. They have very specific reasons for being in relationships, but they are not built on the universal need we all have, which is to love. Narcissists do not enter or stay in relationships for love. Their motives are quite different. I believe they become involved in relationships in order to ensure their needs are met. It’s really that simple…nothing more, but certainly nothing less.

Narcissists are Pathological Charmers and known to thrive on Games! In fact, many victim’s of the narcissist later describe it as a roller coaster ride on steroids! Initial highs followed by many sudden lows. This is why often most victim’s have a very hard time getting over the break up and the loss of the narcissist!

Deadly Mistakes Women Fail To Realize When Dealing With Narcissists, Narcissistic Men & Narcissistic Relationships

Mistake #1When being discarded by a narcissist, women fail to realize this is not their fault!

Being in love with a narcissist is a confusing state of affairs, to say the least. In the beginning, a narcissist makes you feel incredibly loved and valued. He appears to be head-over-heels in love with you and worships the ground you walk on. He writes you poetry, takes you out for romantic dinners, and finds all your little quirks endearing and adorable.

Narcissists know exactly what you want to hear and exactly who you want them to be. Narcissists are gifted manipulators who can sweep anyone off their feet. They are charming and irresistible. Above all, they make you feel as though they understand you like no man has or ever will. This is all common with Narcissistic behavior!

I KNOW THIS PERSONALLY!

From the perfect beginning to the ugly and painful end, it’s as if narcissists read the same manual! In the beginning they build the unsuspecting loved one’s self-esteem up to a point they had never experienced before, and then slowly, painfully and viciously the narcissist tears them DOWN AND RIPS THEM APART!

So you ask… How Do We Fall For This Trap?

Beauty Behind The Beast – The Narcissist, Narcissistic Behavior, Narcissistic Traits, Narcissistic Personality, Idealization And Devaluation

Meet Prince Charming ( As in, the Narcissist) – Out of nowhere, the narcissist appears – rocking your world like a category 10!

He is so good that he doesn’t have to say anything. He is so well built; he can read your mind, body and spirit. The narcissist flourishes you with gifts, attention, time and energy. He romances you. He calls constantly and sends hourly reminders of his existence. The narcissist is the complete package. Never before have you encountered such a whirlwind of events that made you consciously know he’s the one. The narcissist is overtly caring, charming, sexy, smart, intuitive, refreshing and literally addicting.

The narcissist showers you with attention, praise, compliments and through his constant reminders lets you know he is completely interested in you.

As time passes, you fall madly and crazily in love with ‘HIM’! You feel sick, you can’t eat, you don’t know what you are thinking and feeling, but you are ‘thinking excessively’. You feel happy, you feel sad and unsettled, you worry, your ecstatic. It’s the intoxicating moment you’ve so patiently waited for. The moment when you finally feel desired, attractive, special, adored and loved! Without effort, someone understands you, accepts you, admires and idolizes YOU!

AND THEN SOMETHING BEGINS TO CHANGE

Mr. Wonderful / Mr. Price Charming is not the same man!

Perhaps it was a slow gradual process or an immediate change, but something changed! This man is not the same man. Who is he?

All relationships with an incredibly romantic beginning eventually calm down. One day your Prince with all his charm doesn’t look quite the same. And in fact, he doesn’t look at you as the ‘Center Fold’ you once were, (a figment of his imagination). This is normal!

During the normal honeymoon stage in relationship, both you and your partner can only see the dynamics of something fresh, something new. The excitement and newness of the relationship, the cycles of highs and lows are all normal!

The actress and the actor are now forced with seeing each other outside of the obvious roles they’ve been playing, and the crossing point where one must face reality.

But the horrifying fact is, when dealing with a narcissist, no one can ever expect the cycle you will eventually face. It’s quite different! The ‘Game Face’, which is an essential tactic in any competitive event, and often used by a narcissist is now starting to dissipate. His ‘Mask’ slowly begins to come off. His personality disorder beaming through.

During the luring stage of the relationship, the Narcissist totally idealizes his victim. (Narcissistic Idealization)

He indicates he sees her as wonderful, perfect, his soul mate. He notes her amazing abilities, her brilliance, sweetness, and any other personality trait he can hone in on. He did this in order to speed up the sensation of attachment and move the relationship forward quickly.

Narcissist feed off the attention they get from people. Adoration from others is what fuels them. It is like a drug to them and they are addicted to it. NS is any form of attention an individual receives from others.

The emotional abuse that occurs in a relationship with a Narcissist is merciless and relentless. Narcissists brainwash us. They use several different methods of coercion in order to obtain control over us. They love us madly in the beginning, sweep us off our feet and falter in the end!

Once the narcissist realizes he has YOU, that you in fact LOVE HIM, the real nightmare begins!

Devaluation (Narcissistic Devaluation) Sets In!

Mistake #2Women fail to realize that the narcissist uses forms of punishment to control his victim’s!

Narcissistic Devaluation, Silent Treatment, Ignoring, Cognitive Dissonance

Yes, during this stage, the underside of the Narcissistic Personality seeps through. His temperament changes and so does yours. He quits calling and YOU call more. His messages are shorter and yours get longer. The once confident now becomes clingy, needy, and insecure. The once adored and idolized NOW gets ignored, confused, and resorts to a state of confusion. He uses avoiding tactics, ignoring and silent treatment as a form of punishment!

It’s inevitable – criticisms, recriminations and humiliations are foisted upon the partner. The narcissist conjures up the tiniest mistake or oversight to use as an opening for a major battle. He or she throws out empty accusations with vehemence as if they were the worst crime ever perpetrated.

Or reverse psychology is performed and the narcissist which initially portrayed to be the ideal partner, the prince in shining armor now uses taglines like ‘ I am no good for you or we are not good together’! It’s an experience the victim never understands. Probably never will.

The reality is, when a narcissist is chasing after you, he uses every lure in his box. The narcissist has learned from previous performances exactly what it takes to lure in his next catch, and will go to extreme measures in getting what he wants. And he so often does!

Narcissistic Devaluation – From The Beautiful Beginning To The Painful Brutal Ending – The Cycles Of A Narcissist

On the face of it, there is no (emotional) partner or mate, who typically “binds” with a narcissist. They come in all shapes and sizes. The initial phases of attraction, infatuation and falling in love are pretty normal. The narcissist puts on his best face – the other party is blinded by budding love.

Initially women have high standards and to a large degree remain extremely picky in choosing her mate however, once you have been struck by a narcissist, his ability to persuade is incredible! He is the master of acting and his seducing ways are very hard to see through, very hard to walk away from. Again, this is why we obsess and become obsessed with having answers! This is why the break up and getting over a narcissist is so difficult!

But… What If I told You, It Was Completely Possible To Walk Away From A Narcissist? That YOU Hold The Power?

Mistake #3 After being devalued and discarded by a narcissist, the women often believe something is wrong with them.. As in weak, needy or crazy!

Hear this loud and clear… I firmly believe that the women who Narcissists are attracted to are far from being weak! In fact, narcissistic men live for the chase. Always looking for bigger brighter stars!

Often the women are attractive, high achievers, strong, confident and viewed by the narcissist as having great potential. This is also commonly known as Narcissistic Source of Supply.

With the narcissist, it’s the grandiose illusion that he deserves the very best in life. The best job, the best education, the best children, the best mate and unfortunately for the victims, once the conquest is over and the narcissist has achieved his mission, the thrill is over.

The heartbreak, the shattered trust, knowing he cheated, not having answers, the lies, the narcissist silent treatment, the avoiding and rejection is what leaves us heartbroken!

“With a Narcissist – There is no “typical victim”. Women in all walks of life, wealthy and poor, smart and dumb, tall and short, head turning and less so – all fall prey to the Narcissists abuse.” Dr. Sam Vaknin

We all love ourselves or at least we should. In fact, we all carry on some level a form of narcissism. Narcissism in it’s healthy stages is real, it was typically drives us humans to take care of ourselves. To wake up, brush our teeth, groom ourselves, and essentially a driver in motivating us to be our best. Again, this is the healthy stage of narcissism.

Loving your true self is healthy, it’s functional, it’s imperative and absolutely normal. For the narcissist, it goes well beyond the levels of simply wanting to be his best. In the mind of a narcissist, he is the best, and nothing short of. He will never accept anything less than the best and ladies…. Despite how wonderful and amazing you truly are (and you are), the narcissist is NEVER satisfied!

The narcissist will always keep searching! The narcissist always believes that somewhere, somehow, someone is better! This is why to begin the process of..

Mistake #4After the break up with a narcissist, victim’s often believe they were discarded, devalued and rejected by the narcissist because they were not good enough..

Ladies, Sam writes it best.

“Narcissists don’t take Partners, Narcissists take Prisoners”

Victim’s should realize this has nothing to do with not being good enough!

A narcissist will simply discard and devalue his prized loved ones when he is totally convinced he has mastered the conquest of obtaining you as a loving, adoring, faithful, admiring partner.

With a narcissist, this process is inevitable! Keep in mind, this evaluation of theirs is totally subjective and not grounded in reality at all. Suddenly, because of boredom, a disagreement, a bad day, a memory of a previous partner or a new women/new source of supply is marked by the narcissist, he will swing from total idealization to complete devaluation.

If discarded or replaced by a new source of supply, VICTIM’S should realize this is not about being replaced with someone who is perceived as BETTER!!! Bottom-line, she is new! She is new Narcissistic Supply!

You must accept the fact that you were not an object of love to this person, but a pawn, a mere source of supply to feed their fragile ego; nothing more, but certainly nothing less. Once you understand how the narcissist constantly change their sources of supply, you will realize their rejection, the high’s and low’s, being devalued or discarded has absolutely nothing to do with you!

Sadly, these new sources of supply will eventually experience what you are experiencing! The narcissist will repeat this cycle in every relationship they enter. It is inevitable!!!!

Whatever you do and regardless if you purchase this book or not – never compare yourself the the narcissist new source of supply! Never put it in your mind she is better than you, she is not!

Remember, at this stage in the mind of a narcissist, this is not about you! It’s All About HIM!

To Take Back Your Power, To Really Bother A Narcissist, To Take Back CONTROL Over What Is Happening – Get This Out Of Your Mind!

If You Want To Really See A Narcissist In Action – Don’t Chase HIM, Don’t Validate HIM, Don’t Plead With HIM, Don’t Contact HIM!

This is totally what the narcissist expects you to do!

Mistake #5 Why getting over  the devaluation of a narcissist takes so long? Women become fixated on the narcissist, the illusion and the fantasy the narcissist created..

Not only is the narcissist a master of creating fantasy illusions for his victim’s, women spend entirely too much time wasting their lives while focusing on the WRONG man! Not only so, women are far too willing to give the man in her life the almighty power of controlling her happiness. With A Narcissist – You will spend the rest of your life following the shadow of a man who is damaged by his narcissistic personality disorder!

You need to reach beyond the remorse, the pain, the feelings, the sadness, the disappointment! You need to kick your urge of wanting to settle for yet another sleepless round of fantasia! Plain and simple, Narcissists get bored, Narcissists play games Narcissists cheat and Narcissists Abuse! Is this what you want?

With Narcissistic Men, the GAMES never end! In fact, as sick it sounds, as unfortunate as it truly is – narcissists thrive on GAMES. The only way to ever truly win the GAME with a narcissist is to NOT play at all!

In This eBook, You Will Learn How To Free Yourself From A Narcissist! You Will Learn Many Steps That Will Help You Recover From A Narcissist!

Here Are Some Of The Secrets You’ll Learn

Inside My Informative eBook

  • I will show you how to regain your power back and learn how to tame the narcissist by knowing who the narcissist REALLY IS! The narcissists Fragile Ego
  • In my book I will cover 6-Steps that are critical to ones recovery! I will also cover many areas in helping you move forward and regain your power back from narcissism abuse. You hold the Power! Your Power is what the narcissist wants. The 6-Steps
  • I will show you throughout my book how to understand and recognize what is happening, why it’s happening and ways to cope with the trauma and pain you are feeling! Understand IT
  • When coming out of a relationship with a narcissist, the first thing we need to do is get real with ourselves about what happened in the relationship. Only by understanding the Narcissist do we realize we have suffered emotional abuse and trauma at the hands of the person we love.
  • In this e-Book, I will give you the inside scoop on what’s REALLY going on inside the narcissists mind, the narcissists behavior, the narcissist traits, including the things he doesn’t want you to know.. I will show you how to identify and recognize the true nature of a narcissist. I will help you understand the complex world of a narcissist and help you understand just what it is that gives them such power and control in your reality… The Narcissist In The Making
  • I will also show you the dynamics of a narcissist and why he is incapable of loving, why he continues to come back and why this relationship truly fits the modern-day roller-coaster. – Narcissistic Personality Disorder
  • I will address the crazy making of a narcissist and answer questions like, Why Does the narcissist devalue & discard?
  • Why it’s crucial to understand that narcissists Can’t Change!
  • In this book, I truly want you to GET REAL WITH WHO WE ARE DEALING WITH and accept the fact you deserve better!
  • I am often asked by victims, did he ever love me? While we want to desperately believe that somewhere in this nonsense, this is the case, it’s important to realize that narcissists can’t love.
  • So the sex is amazing… It was always amazing, even during the low spots.. I will walk you through the what drives the sexual side of a narcissist and cover the Madonna Whore Complex.
  • How can a smart intelligent woman LIKE ME, who’s gut tells her something isn’t quite right – she knows he is lying, she knows that she is NOT CRAZY – ‘evidence proves that’, and through his words, his infrequent acts of kindness – she falters, she believes him, she forgives? This book will identify and address how we fall and why we fall for a narcissist!
  • I will also show in this section why we are drawn to the narcissist.
  • So he’s gone, he’s ignoring you, he is with someone else but….. Do they miss us?
  • How can a man accuse a woman of being unfaithful, unappreciative, jealous, over-sensitive, demanding and all the while, she remains a ‘Stand by Her Man’ kind of woman. Someone that is faithful, admiring, honest, compassionate and in-love? Someone that has forgiven him and taken him back on countless occasions? How can a man be so manipulative convincing his partner that she is over-reacting, absurd or possibly crazy? That she is being over-sensitive, over-dramatic and thinks too much? I will address why relationships with narcissists turn into roller-coaster rides and why the narcissists comes back?
  • I will help you understand that once you have been discarded or replaced by what is perceived as a new better Source of Supply, you should count your blessings! These new Sources of Supply will also feel the wrath of the Narcissist. It’s the inevitable. Give it time, it will happen.
  • Your love is my drug, right? I will cover why it’s so hard for us to stay away from a narcissist and how to deal with the pain and loss of a narcissist!
  • But what if I just had answers or closure, they would help me move on, right? I will educate you on why the narcissist never provides closure..
  • So now what? I feel obsessed… I will show you simple ways of putting that nervous energy to work!
  • So we have all been there… Wanting to communicate, wanting to say so many things that were never said. I will cover areas of writing letters to the narcissist.
  • Outside of simply letting go and accepting what is happening, No contact with the Narcissist is one of the hardest things we victims face. I dedicated a FULL chapter to NO CONTACT.
  • I will help you find ways of coping with the Obsessive Thoughts.
  • Much compared to the reasons Narcissists come back, I will try and help you understand, and make sense of the non-sense when communicating with the Narcissist.
  • This book will help you realize why it’s so important to take back your power! Your power is what the narcissist wants and thrives on. I will show you why the narcissist discards his mates after the chase is over and more importantly, that you should never compare or feel threatened by his new Source of Supply. Hence, a new girlfriend, wife, job, hobby. Whatever!
  • I show you simply ways in how you can cope with the fears you may experience, the break up and realize that FEAR is what keeps you from having POWER.
  • If there is one thing the Narcissist sets out to do from day one is to control his victims. I will show you how to take back control.
  • Yes, this is NOT easy… But I will help you explore ways of breaking your addiction with the Narcissist.
  • I will also show you ways of dealing with all the Anxiety you may experience and to help you realize you will and can do this..
  • When all of this happened to me, I knew I had to find and outlet to stream all of this energy and pain.. When I did, I wrote my first book, created a CD of songs and created www.allabouthim.com to help others who may also be suffering. I will show why its so important to take your mind off the Narcissist and use this energy on something that will benefit YOU. The narcissist will take and take as long as you continue to allow him..
  • I will show you why the best medicine against the narcissist is to focus on YOUR future, narcissists envy anything positive and HATE to see other people rise to the top.
  • If anything drives a narcissist crazy – it’s to think about you moving on. Whether they admit this or not!!! I will show you why YOU must focus on YOU and YOUR outlook for the future. Take Back YOUR Power.
  • I will show why it’s key to create a new life for ourselves. We owe it to ourselves. Life is short and this is it. This is not a dress rehearsal. This is life. Live it and embrace it. We must live in the moment and be honest with ourselves at all times. We deserve real, genuine love. Believe it or not, there are people out there who are capable of it.
  • I will show you how to embrace each day and to be grateful you have the emotional capacity to feel and love again in the future. A narcissist does not have that and will never have that. A narcissist will simply go on preying on people to get his/her needs met – over and over and over.
  • If you get anything at all from this book, I want you to realize YOU can Survive A Narcissist. I did, and countless others I have coached have survived and moved on. As painful as it is, as much as you don’t want to believe me, YOU can survive this..

I have spent the past seven years of my life helping victims recover from Narcissistic abuse!

This book is the beginning to recovery. The beginning of rediscovering yourself and the beginning of what I consider, freeing YOURSELF from the Narcissist, and ultimately TAKING YOUR POWER BACK!!

Power Is What The Narcissists Wants! Breaking Up His Control Is What YOU Want!

YOU hold the magical solution. YOU hold the Power! This book will help you begin that process!

So what are people saying?

Out of the thousands who have responded, Here are just a few of so many people this book has helped..

I could have never prepared for the brutal ending that I would later face with my ex Narcissist! The pain, the shock, the disgrace and worst of it all, no warnings and absolutely no closure. Sure we had problems, what relationship doesn’t? But what I found after being discarded and totally blind-sided, is that I was not his only victim! There were two of us! I suppose what made it worse, is that after all the lies of telling me he loved me and how we would spend the rest of our lives together, he chose HER! This book REALLY helped me!! Thank you so much.. Megan – Lakeland, FL

Dear Lisa, Therapists and friends repeatedly told me during and after the relationship that my ex was a Narcissist (he is after all a VERY successful actor.) At the time, I did not understand, nor did my friends or even therapists, the magnitude of what narcissism is. I think it was a term used lightly to describe someone who is self-absorbed. Through many of my readings on the subject, I learned it is much more, and my experience with a Narcissist is not unique; however, cannot truly be understood by anyone who has not experienced it for themselves. On my continued path to healing and regaining my self-worth, I came across your book. It is the most comprehensible book I have read on the subject and I can relate so well to your experience. Thank you for your book…it’s nice to know that I’m not crazy or alone! Beth – St. Louis, MO

I am nearing the end of an on again – off again, 6 year roller-coaster ride from hell with a man just like this! So one might question, why 6 years? I too question this. The only thing I resort back to is the moments when is so convincing, so loving and well – the way he treats me during the good times. What’s so frightening, the good times never out- way the bad! This book really opened my eyes! Jessica – Seaside Heights, NJ

In response to the crazy making they cause, this book totally woke me up! It’s ironic because I always told my ex that he made me “crazy”. All the ups and downs, the roller-coaster ride that never seemed to end, it all simply took its toll! He mentioned it a few months ago and I told him that he did make me crazy, I didn’t know why, but he was the only one that literally made me feel crazy. Every time he broke my heart he always made charming excuses for why he did it. But when I look back and closely analyze his reasoning’s, he clearly blamed me for everything that happened. I hate feeling “lost”. In the end, not only was I completely blindsided to find out he was seeing someone else during the last few years of our relationship, but to make it worse, I hate myself for believing all his lies. I hate myself for believing in him. He never loved me. He was completely incapable of loving anyone. Amy – St. Pete, FL

It wasn’t that long ago when I found myself at a turning point in my life. A time when I would painfully have to accept that the relationship I was holding onto for the past three years had come to its final destination. As sad as it seems, as I think and reflect back, the relationship was merely holding on by life support, and had been for a very long time.Even though I can see this now, I was completely blinded by my love for him. I can only assume the majority of my intense emotions were driven by the fact he had been my first everything. When I say everything, I mean everything. My lover, my first sexual experience, my best friend, my business partner, my world. Perhaps he and I were too much alike. We both had a fighting side to us. We could fight like the best of them and yet the making up felt like fireworks. Either way, it was coming to an end and for the first time in my life, I was completely losing it. I never thought I would rebound and this book gave me so much hope. Thanks Lisa and keep writing… Michelle – Houston, TX

Lisa E. Scott’s painstaking work in reliving and recording exactly the narcissist’ rhetoric and actions will sadly, gently ring true for many unsuspecting victims caught in the Narcissistic Tsunami. But at some point, submerged reality will surface to reveal the impending devastation to the victim’s sanity, self-confidence, safe home life, workplace success, social relationships, or perhaps even a child’s dream of tomorrow. How many tsunamis can one survive? It is the resolute actions next taken, on the heels of realization, which charts the course of our collective future success….or failure. Denise Martine

Many followers of the narcissist never wake up. They continue to be selfless servants, unable to separate themselves psychologically from the narcissist. Many of those who do become aware of the price they are paying (giving up their own lives), make the bargain, and decide that the lifestyle, and perks connected with being a part of the narcissists charmed circle is worth it! They are wrong!

The narcissist will never change and the best revenge, what gets to a narcissist, what bothers the narcissist, and the absolute best way in getting over a narcissist break up is to take control. Take back your life and power! These type of men can not stand seeing YOU happy, and especially without them!

Skip Months Of Wondering And Questioning Yourself!!

This eBook is stocked full of information that will not only change the way you look at narcissism, but also give you a simple step program in breaking free from the toxic cycles of loving a narcissist and addresses many of the secrets in what makes a narcissist tick, and how to free ourselves from the narcissists control!

Your ‘Secret Weapon’ To Getting Over A Narcissist Break Up & A Narcissistic Relationship! What Do You Have To Lose?

Begin Your Journey To Recovery And Break Free From The Narcissist Now By Purchasing This eBook!

For Instant Access Download Surviving A Narcissist Now

Survive A Narcissist_surviving a narcissist_narcissistic relationshipSurviving A Narcissist: The Path Forward — A new E-book from Lisa E. Scott (the author of top-selling e-book “All About Him.”) This book will take you much deeper into the cycles one faces in Surviving A Narcissist and the Steps one might use on The Path to Recovery!

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Key Topics- Surviving A Narcissist, Narcissist, Break Up, Narcissist Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Men, Sociopaths, Devalues and Discards, No Contact, Malignant Narcissism, Narcissism, Toxic Personalities, Narcissist Victims, Narcissistic Source of Supply

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